Monday, December 05, 2011

Complaints-Lady goes postal (have I done that already???)

I guess YM would put this in the category of “First World Problems,” but still…

Ted’s mother sent us a package on Thursday, with 1-day delivery.  It didn’t come Friday or today.  In fact, as far as we can tell, it’s still in Mississauga.

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Mississauga???

Here’s what I sent to Canada Post:

This package was sent with next-day delivery on Thursday. On Friday it was "processed at local delivery facility" - in Mississauga, nowhere near our home. Then, it was "out for delivery." We didn't receive it, probably because we don't live in Mississauga. Again on Friday, it was "processed," and then locked up for the weekend. Today, again in Mississauga, the package was "out for delivery" twice, and finally "redirected to recipient's new address." I'm hoping this means somebody finally realized that we don't live in Mississauga, though we never have lived there. I'd appreciate any update you could provide as to when our package will arrive. How do we go about getting a refund for the extra shipping charges, since this is nothing at all like "next-day" delivery?

The fun part was that, in order to register on Canada Post’s website so I could follow up on my inquiry, I had to complete an extra step and create a password.  Easy, right?  Here are the criteria for setting up a password – tighter than Fort Knox, this site:

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The password must have:

  • at least one number
  • at least one letter
  • at least one special character
  • cannot contain “identical consecutive characters” eg Pizza, table99
  • must have between 5 and 8 characters

Sheesh.  I have gotten passwords for income taxes and personal banking more easily than this package-tracking website.  But anyway, I picked a password that met all the conditions (one special character!) and finally got the two passwords (under 9 characters!) to match.

But then, I forgot about this little deal-breaker…

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“For security purposes your password may not be accepted if it contains commonly used words.”

Mine did.  Bzzzt!  I’ll admit, it had the name of a fruit in it.  My passwords sometimes contain nouns because that makes them easier to use and, if you vary the nouns, still extremely secure.  Security experts sometimes recommend using two nouns, often with punctuation and/or other gibberish in between.  But nope – not good enough for Canada Post.

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Finally, finally, FINALLY, you will be relieved to know, I managed to pick a password that didn’t contain any nouns or verbs, but DID contain at least one of all the special things listed above.  It’s more like a scavenger hunt than a list of password-security suggestions.

Sheesh.  The box contains snowsuits for the kiddies, by the way, though I was hoping the 1-day delivery meant Ottawa bagels.  There are probably also shaving supplies inside for Ted – his mother is very big on making sure he keeps on shaving.  I think it’s a Jew thing.  It’s certainly not an URGENT parcel, but anyway.  The good news is that now – with my ultra-secure password - I can track the snowsuits and shaving cream confidently from anywhere in the world!

3 comments:

  1. I'm only laughing because the symbols make me think of comic strip swearing, which is probably what you felt like doing when your passwords were rejected. :oD

    Peace and Laughter,
    Cristina

    ReplyDelete
  2. @Anonymous - it's my theory, not his. A few years ago, the packages started arriving with a big ziploc baggie filled with shaving foam and razors, the really nice 5-blade kind. She must know we HAVE shaving supplies here in town... so my theory is that she's worried that, now that he's Jewish, he will give up shaving and become one of those "beardy Jews." Like, Jewish is bad but she can live with it - "beardy Jew" is where she draws the line.
    Bear in mind that this is a very sweet older woman, a retired nurse, and this could very well NOT be her intention at all, but just my own projection. We've never discussed it. :-)
    Thanks for stopping by!

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