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Sorry – I avoid F2F: do you?
A response to Batya’s post where she says she prefers seeing friends F2F:
Not me! I think I'm very different in person; I think there’s a huge disconnect between my online personality and my in-person personality. And I think the online one is more authentically me.
F2F, I'm pretty withdrawn in social situations outside of my immediate family - almost autistically so, though I've never been diagnosed. I tend to avoid any social contact that doesn't involve small children playing nearby.
I make friends slowly and only with people who have very identifiable bodies and/or facial features because everybody tends to look alike and blur together. If you look average, we can’t be friends; sorry – there are simply too many of you!
(in a more extreme form, it’s called prosopagnosia, and Oliver Sacks has it)
The computer eliminates this problem: the person's name, blog, etc., are right up there at the top of my screen.
I've been emailing my friends in various ways since 1982... so it feels way more natural than F2F.
Written text allows me to "see” other people's thoughts and lives in an explicit way that isn’t possible in person and it lets me communicate my ideas as articulately as possible.
Every paragraph you see on this blog has probably been reworked five times or so, crafting it to perfection. This paragraph has been no exception; it’s lucky I type fast.
All of which said: maybe it's my neshama yeseirah, but on Shabbos, I'm able to socialize and interact with guests and we all usually have a good time. And then I see the people during the week and barely say hello.
Honestly, I think I’d be disappointed, meeting myself in person.
Which do you prefer, seeing friends f2f or online???
I prefer both, depending on the person. I have some friends who I could never be friends with online, and vice versa.ReplyDelete
Jennifer, very interesting. Maybe that's why I had trouble remembering students' names...ReplyDelete
But I do like real social 1-2-1 interaction.
If you had the chance to f2f me, would you?
Batya: Yes, of course; Rosh Chodesh at Tel Shiloh is on my list of Must-Do activities and as my family knows, if it is on the Must-Do list, it gets DONE. But I would be VERY shy and not talk at all! :-oReplyDelete
For the most part, I also prefer online interaction. If it's folks I'm not too close with, then it's a no brainer. But very good friends? I'd prefer f2f on the weekends- I'm very protective of "schoolnights."ReplyDelete
Interesting topic. Something to think on.
It's hard for me to manage face-to-face situations too. I think Becca hit on something, that there are some friends one couldn't have in person (but can online) and the other way around. For some reason though, outside of a small group and my immediate family, face-to-face relationships seem more transient than online. Interesting...ReplyDelete
I forgot to mention, I'm stopping by from the link page at Six Word SaturdayReplyDelete
I think I'm similar to you. I'm much more open online. I've come out of my shell a bit lately though and have met a few online friends in person this year. And lived to tell the tale!ReplyDelete