Night of the Living Bread

Okay, apparently I am elitist, snobby, geeky, or just plain weird.

Who dares attack me in this harsh way? Well, one of my loyal children, of course; you probably already guessed that.

Why? Because I happened to mention to a friend the other day that I put in the new lights above our dining room (aka “only”) table because – and these were my exact words – “I make a lot of breads here late at night.”

So this child totally jumped on me (metaphorically speaking) to slay the word “breads,” which he/she claimed was utterly pretentious or geeky.

Apparently, real people, who speak properly, simply refer to it as “making bread.” Only elitists and snobs and geeks and whatever-it-ises refer to their various efforts as “breads.”

I protested: “They are different breads! There’s challah, and rye, and pizza, and sourdough…”

Sure, if you only make one KIND of bread, or don’t care very much, just call it bread. But if you have a varied repertoire, and have acquired some degree of skill in bread-making (albeit a LOW degree of skill at times!), I maintain that you have the right to refer to what you make as BREADS. Plural.

Just as if you stitched tapestries… plural. Or composed symphonies… plural. I bake breads.

Of course, this child also said it sounded hippy-ish. “I make a lot of bread, man.” To me, that just sounds irrational, or even like a counter-argument in my favour. But you try arguing with a teenager.

For more of my Adventures in Bread, visit my Bread Blog!f

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