Saturday, October 24, 2009

Superstition...

When I was first pregnant with GZ, I sort of kind of avoided being around my sister because she mentioned at one point that she had her period.  She'd been over at our house a bit more than usual because I think she wasn't working at the time, and at one point, maybe totally coincidentally, we both had it on the same day.  So I thought, totally irrationally, maybe our cycles had aligned and then... well... maybe here I was pregnant but the invisible "pull" of her period might cause me to lose the baby.
 
There, I said it.
Completely unscientific.
 
I mean, I had absolutely no evidence that our cycles had synchronized, let alone that she could possibly exert an invisible "pull" so powerful that it could cause a miscarriage without any physical contact.  There is no such thing.  I know that.  Please do not call the folks in the white coats on me.
 
Nevertheless, knowing all that, knowing that a baby that is going to miscarry is going to miscarry - and that a baby who is going to stick is going to stick - I was still nervous.
Not to the point of social awkwardness.  We were together, we hugged, whatever.  I absolutely didn't let it affect anything externally, I think.  That's why I said "sort of kind of" before.  If she cancelled a time when we were supposed to see her, I would maybe be a little relieved.  But I wouldn't cancel it myself.  For example.  Just defining the parameters of this meshigas for you so you can see how well-thought-out it was so I wouldn't hurt her feelings.
 
But it was a few months before I felt totally comfortable around her.  No knowledge of what her body was doing at the time, mind you, beyond that one mention, early on, of a period; I just felt, deep down in the irrational tiger-mama part of my brain, that at some point, she had menstruated and was therefore, on some weird level, a danger to my fragile developing baby.
 
And why am I remembering all of this now?
Hmm... definitely not because my body could possibly pose a danger at the moment to anyone else's fragile, developing embryo.  At least, there's not with any scientific evidence it could.  :-)))
Still.  In the land of weird phobias, this one kind of makes sense...

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