YM has some very tight deadlines to finish his courses by mid-June, and several (okay, many) things are due this week. Fair enough. Tonight, he also had a job interview for a day camp he applied to (he probably won't get the job, if only because he's away for most of August, but I wanted to support him). So we talked ahead of time about how much work he'd have to do today (three half-hour sessions, at least: one for each subject). And he did some before supper.
After supper (slicey meats at my mother's house), we took off for his 7:25 interview. In the car, we talked about how he was going to use the computer as soon as we came home to do his schoolwork, that I was not going to use the computer (despite my having a deadling tonight!) so he could get his things done, etc.
While he had the interview, I was planning to pick up Ted, so when I dropped him off, I started to say we'd be back at 8 to pick him up, but thought better of it: if Ted was done early, we'd be coming right back. So I said, "just wait out front when you're done."
So, yay, Ted had finished work early and was ready when we got there at 7:30 to pick him up. Turn around, head back to the interview, arrive back at 7:40: NO YM anywhere.
Me, get out, search building repeatedly (all three floors!), no boy.
Wait several minutes, with grumpy Littles in back of car.
Me, 15 minutes later: "Let's circle the parking lot, check the playground, and then take off. He'll probably turn up at the last minute."
Indeed, as Ted was just getting ready to circle, he appeared from out of the playground. Argh.
Headed for home, downplaying the fireworks I wanted Ted to take the Littles to so YM wouldn't feel he was Missing Out.
Ted took the Littles out, I started ushering Elisheva towards bed, had YM turn on the computer to get started.
Me, gathering stuff to go to the garden for the first time today (it was already quite dark out, but I was determined to hang Tomato #2, the cheapo hanging-grocery-bag planter!!!).
Me to YM: "You are using the computer for school work. If you do anything other than school work, you are going straight to bed. I will be coming in to do random spot checks; only use the computer for school work."
Him: "Okay," and diligently getting started on math stuff.
Me, outside, doing tomato stuff, humming along.
Kinda feeling my peaceful place feeling.
Elisheva comes out to say Shema in the garden (even though she was freezing!). Kiss her, hug her, say goodnight.
More tomato stuff.
Time for a random spot check on The Boy.
A computer game website???
Not a game in itself, you understand, which he has frequently argued in the past makes it legitimate. And I agree: in his free time, I don't really care what websites he goes to - within reason. But I specifically said school work ONLY.
Him: Noooooooo...aaaaaaaaa..... CRY... I know you said it, I know, I know, please, please...
Him: You don't care about my school work!!!
I used to be a lovely person, I swear I did.
The interaction ended when he slunk off downstairs to quietly do math at his desk until he got tired and crawled into bed. No Shema. No bedtime. Probably no teeth-brushing.
How can I love him more???
I have really tried this weekend, that's the stupid thing. Elisheva was away over Shabbos, and I tried to use it as an excuse to give him more positive attention, more touchy, jokey, and so on.
I have not even mentioned the missing Krazy Glue or the 2 weeks overdue (at $1 a day) Fast-Read library book of mine that Ted found in his room this morning.
Will he get through this and emerge a mentsch on the other side?
Magic Eight Ball says...
2) My sources say no
3) My sources say no
4) Ask again later
5) Outlook not so good
Yay!!! It said YES!!!
I will now stop asking.